The Only Wedding Ceremony Script You Need

Screen+Shot+2020-02-09+at+7.01.26+AM.jpg

Whew, if you’re googling around on the internet for wedding ceremony scripts, you’ve probably seen that there are tons of examples out there, and it can be overwhelming. Where to start, right?

When I wrote my first script eight years ago, I did the same thing you’re doing right now - took so many examples from all over the internet and pieced them together to make my own script. Years later, I’ve officiated hundreds of weddings, and I still use that same first basic script as a starting point to create a beautiful, personal and unique ceremony for each couple.

So this is the script that I’m sharing below. Really, it’s all you need. It’s got a tried and true structure, it’s not cheesy or generic or too long, it fits any spiritual or non-spiritual style, and there are plenty of places to get creative and make it your own.

I invite you to take advantage of the heavy lifting that I’ve already done by putting this tried and true script structure together. That means you don’t have to! Simply follow the three steps below…

A note before we begin: My biggest advice as an officiant who’s written hundreds of wedding ceremony scripts to rave reviews

If you can, refrain from looking at too many examples of ceremony scripts. It’s great to look at a couple to get the basic logistics down. But for the meaningful writing, I encourage you to minimize your contact with other people’s words. The most potent ceremony writing comes from an emotional place that wells up from inside when you are truly stirred by the connection of this couple in love.

Whether you are the couple writing your own ceremony, or a friend/relative officiant, you have a genuine voice with its own style, and that is what will make this ceremony special. When you have too many other people’s words and ideas in your head, you lose contact with that voice. And that voice is all you need to create a ceremony that is not just “nice” but that deeply moves everyone involved.

Follow the prompts included in the script below to use your genuine voice in key places!

Click here to learn about the full Heart & Soul Ceremony and Officiant Kit

Step 1: Take a look at the basic wedding ceremony script overview.

This entire ceremony usually takes 20 - 25 minutes without the mini ceremony, and as long as you keep “About The Couple” under five minutes. Add a mini ceremony in and average time is around 25 - 30 minutes. This structure works beautifully for any size ceremony from just a few guests to several hundred, or even for an elopement with just the couple:

Anatomy Of Your Basic Ceremony Script

  • Processional

  • Welcome

  • Acknowledgements

  • Reading

  • About The Couple

  • I Do’s

  • Vows

  • Mini Ceremony

  • Rings

  • Blessing

  • Pronouncement & Kiss

  • Presentation

  • Recessional

Step 2: Spiritual, religious or simply meaningful.

The basic script below is simply meaningful without a particular spiritual or religious flavor. Couples these days range across a wide spectrum of styles - from deeply religious to spiritual-but-not-religious to atheist to everything in between. Make note right now if a spiritual or religious vibe is relevant, and if so, you can weave that style throughout. Good places to do this:

In the Welcome: For example, “We are gathered here in nature, where trees and rocks and big open sky are so obviously connected, because this easily reminds you of the interconnection that we all share…”

Just before I Do’s: For example, “With God’s witness… do you, Alex, take Shane to be your…”

Just after Vows: For example, “Goddess bless your vows for the lifetime of your marriage.”

In the Closing Blessing: With the blessing of all that is Love, and the universal spirit that connects us all, you are now joined in this most sacred commitment of marriage.”

Of course, you can weave in anywhere else as well!

Step 3: The full script with prompts to speak from the heart…

Here it is all laid out for you. I’ve used a fictional couple’s names, Alex & Shane, which you will of course swap out. Use this script as your foundational structure, and then change anything you like from there. The beauty of today’s ceremonies is that there are no rules. Some states may require that “I Do’s” be said or some form of consent be given, but really that’s it.

Start with this structure, then see how you are inspired - change words or entire paragraphs for that matter, omit anything that doesn’t feel relevant, add anything that does, and do what feels good. Every ceremony that I write starts here, and then is completely original and unique by the time I’m done with it, as yours will be too.

Click here to learn about the full Heart & Soul Ceremony and Officiant Kit

Processional

We’ll stick to the body of the ceremony on this page. Just click here for a full page on the Processional itself, complete with order and all the different kinds of configurations.

Welcome

“Hello and welcome! Alex & Shane, welcome to your wedding! I am thrilled for the life that you are creating together and for your marriage which begins right now. You have discovered each other, made the conscious decision of commitment, and today you step over the threshold into the first day of the rest of your officially-declared shared life. 

Not only that, you are accompanied by witnesses of the best kind. To our guests (speaks to guests): You are the dear and important people in Alex & Shane’s lives, assembled from near and far to celebrate their union. You are the ones who know them well, and you are an integral part of this ceremony, for the witnesses of a ceremony are just as important to the ceremony as the participants themselves. We feel your love and caring which fills our ceremony with meaning, and is the same love and caring that will create a web of ongoing support for these two throughout their marriage. In this way, you make this ceremony more than just a moment in time between two people, you make this a community milestone event to be remembered for years to come.” 

*Speak From The Heart Opportunity*

If you want to change out these pre-written welcome words with words that come from your deep inspiration, immerse in your excitement for this ceremony location and imagine the caring and love you will feel from guests as the ceremony begins. Then imagine speaking from your heart and welcoming everyone, while writing down the words that come.

Acknowledgements

“Alex & Shane would also like to acknowledge Aunt Martha & Grandma Ellison, who have passed. Even though they are not physically present, we know that their love is here with us on such an important day. Alex & Shane would also like to thank their parents for their continued love and support. Your belief in these two, through thick and thin, has meant the world to them.”

Reading

Pro Tip: A reading at the beginning of the ceremony is a great tool to set the tone. It’s also a great opportunity to give an important person a role by asking them to do the reading instead of the Officiant.

There are so many kinds of readings - from romantic Rumi poetry to funny movie quotes to Carl Sagan talking about astrophysics and love, and all kinds of styles in between. Or if there is a strong religious style in the ceremony, then this is the perfect place to include scripture or a prayer. Choose a reading from my Wedding Reading Resources page here - after officiating for so many years, I’ve got an extensive list of readings that includes all of the above styles.

You can introduce the reading by saying something like this:

“We now call on Shane’s brother Patrick to share a poem called _________ by _________ which speaks simply, yet profoundly to Alex & Shane’s connection.”

Patrick walks to the front and reads.

Officiant thanks Patrick as he returns to his seat.

Or if the Officiant is the one to do the reading:

“We now share a poem called _________ by _________ which speaks simply, yet profoundly to Alex & Shane’s connection.”

About The Couple

Pro Tip: This section is different and unique for every single ceremony. During “About The Couple”, we hear something meaningful about this couple’s connection. Oftentimes a story will be told that quintessentially speaks to what these two are like together or what their connection is about. Or this section may be about a value that is important, or dreams that the couple plan to make happen in their married life. Or maybe you talk about how they first met, or their proposal story because it’s a great example of who they are as a couple.

*Speak From The Heart Opportunity*

At its most basic, this section answers the question, “Who is this couple and what are they about?” Immerse in your excitement for this love, and notice how you would answer that question from your heart, while writing down the words that come.

Click here to learn about the full Heart & Soul Ceremony and Officiant Kit

The I Do’s

Pro Tip: The I Do’s are also known as consent or declaration of intent. If you take it out of ceremony speak, you’re turning to Partner 1 and asking, “Yo Partner 1, you sure you want to marry him/her?” Then you’re doing the same for Partner 2. The order of I Do’s, Vows and Rings is often different depending on the officiant. I like this order because it’s a nice flow: Yes, we want to marry each other (I Do’s), now here’s what we’re promising each other (Vows), and now let’s seal the deal with physical tangible objects that, every time we look at our fingers will remind us of the promises that we’ve made (Rings).”

Here’s some foundational I Do language to get you started…

“So you two, we are at the heart of your ceremony, the part of your wedding day where everything shifts. On one level, you’ll walk away from this ceremony and nothing will have changed – still the same deep love, still the same commitment, still the same life you’ve been so beautifully building together. And, on another level, something will be profoundly different – rather than just a couple in love, you will be legally married and you will have made official vows and promises to one another, with witnesses, in sacred trust. Please hold hands to give your consent and vows in marriage.”

If there is a bouquet, the Maid of Honor, a guest or someone in the wedding party takes the bouquet and holds it so that Alex & Shane can hold hands.

“From the moment you first met each other… to the moment when you knew your love was the real thing… to the moment when you decided to make it official… these are the moments that have led you to this moment where it is time to give your consent in marriage. Alex, we’ll start with you:

Alex, do you take Shane to be your _________ (wife/husband/partner), your best friend and love for life?”

I do.

“Shane, do you take Alex to be your ________ (wife/husband/partner), your best friend and love for life?”

I do. 

The Vows

Pro Tip: The vows below are just an example of what can be said, and of course it’s unique for each and every couple. Visit my pre-written vows page here for examples of repeat-after-officiant vows, traditional or non-traditional.

Or get my Vow Adventure Kit to go on fun dates nights to write your vows!

Another Pro Tip: If you’ve heard of hand fasting and think it would fit this ceremony, this is the place to put it. For more about hand fasting, check out my hand fasting page here.

Here’s the basic vow script structure without hand fasting:

“You have consented to the sacred bond of marriage, and now it is time to share vows - promises that will guide you in the years to come. Alex, please share your vows with Shane by repeating after me (or simply say “Alex, please share your vows with Shane” if they are reading vows from cards):

Alex repeats after Officiant, line by line.

Shane, I promise to be your _________ (wife/husband/partner).

From this day forward, 

I promise to share my life with yours…

to love you, 

to laugh with you,

and to build our dreams together 

while allowing you to grow your dreams. 

I promise to support you through times of trouble,

rejoice with you in times of happiness 

and to have faith in our journey.

I promise to give you all the love I can give

my whole life long.

Officiant turns toward Shane.

And now Shane, please now share your vows with Alex by repeating after me (or simply say “Shane, please share your vows with Alex” if they are reading vows from cards)::

Shane repeats after Officiant, line by line.

Alex, I promise to be your ___________ (wife/husband/partner).

From this day forward, 

I promise to share my life with yours…

to love you, 

to laugh with you,

and to build our dreams together 

while allowing you to grow your dreams. 

I promise to support you through times of trouble,

rejoice with you in times of happiness 

and to have faith in our journey.

I promise to give you all the love I can give

my whole life long.”

Click here to learn about the full Heart & Soul Ceremony and Officiant Kit

Optional Mini Ceremony

After vows is a great spot to do an optional mini ceremony that is symbolic of union. To read descriptions and see scripts for mini ceremonies like Rose Exchange, Tree Planting, Sand Ceremony, Wine Box Ceremony and more, check out my Mini Ceremonies page here.

The Ring Exchange

Pro Tip: What you say about the rings, and the “ring vows” that couples share when they exchange them can be easily changed up - see what really fits the couple here.

“You have made your vows which are promises for the married life that you are beginning right now in this moment. We witness and bless your vows for the lifetime of your marriage. And so we come to the rings. The final ritual in a wedding ceremony is to make your commitment tangible – your rings are the physical representation of the promises you have made to one another today. They symbolize the sanctity of your marriage, and are a constant reminder of your love. 

May we please have the ring for Alex to give to Shane.”

_________ hands the ring to Officiant, then Officiant says to Alex…

“Alex, this ring is a circle of strength with no beginning or end and with no point of weakness. May this ring be a constant reminder of the promises you have made today (Officiant hands ring to Alex). Please place it on Shane’s finger (Alex takes Shane’s left hand and places the ring on the ring finger), and repeat after me (Alex repeats after Officiant):

With this ring I thee wed. 

I give you this ring as a symbol of our commitment

and our connection. 

May we please have the ring for Shane to give to Alex.”

_________ hands the ring to Officiant, then Officiant says to Shane…

“Shane, this ring is a circle of strength with no beginning or end and with no point of weakness. May this ring be a constant reminder of the promises you have made today (Officiant hands ring to Shane). Please place it on Alex’s finger (Shane takes Alex’s left hand and places the ring on the ring finger), and repeat after me (Shane repeats after Officiant):

With this ring I thee wed. 

I give you this ring as a symbol of our commitment

and our connection.”

Officiant asks Alex & Shane to join hands again if they haven’t already…

Blessing & Pronouncement

“Your ring exchange is complete, you have made your promises for your married life, you have given your consent in marriage. With the witness of your friends and family, and the blessing of love that connects us all, you are now joined together in this most sacred commitment of marriage. May the two of you be blessed with a lifetime of health, wealth, love, success and happiness. May you continue to support one another in the wonderful way that you already do, may your love and connection grow exponentially over the years, and may your life together flourish as you walk the journey of it - hand in hand. 

*Speak From The Heart Opportunity*

If you want to swap out this standard blessing language, ask the question, “What does this couple wish to see happen in their married life” and wish these things for them from your heart, while writing down the words that come.

The Pronouncement & Kiss

By the power vested in me by the State of Colorado, and by the power of your own commitment and choice within, I now pronounce you married You may kiss!

Alex & Shane kiss, guests applaud.

The Presentation

I now present to you (Mr. & Mrs _________ or Mr. & Mr. or Mrs. & Mrs or our newlyweds Alex & Shane)!

If there is a bouquet, _________ hands the bouquet back for the recessional walk.

The Recessional

The wedding party recesses down the aisle in the opposite order that they arrived.

Music plays while wedding party recesses.

Announcement

After the wedding party has left.

Please now join our newlyweds for cocktail hour, then dinner under the tent. Have a wonderful evening!

Putting It All Together

Spend time with each script section, personalizing and always coming back to choices that fit with this couple’s style and connection. Enjoy the opportunity to speak about their love from a deeply inspired place within. I’m excited for you to experience this process!

Love, Officiant Lisa

WANT FULL GUIDANCE? GET THE HEART & SOUL CEREMONY and OFFICIANT KIT

Every pro tip needed to write and officiate, plus Q&A Calls to ask questions and get advice…

The Heart & Soul Ceremony Kit includes the tried & true ceremony script plus powerful prompts to fully customize it into a beautiful love story ceremony. It also has an Officiant Guidebook packed with my tips on how to officiate, run the rehearsal, navigate the day-of and more. And… access to a once-monthly Q&A call to ask questions and get my advice as you write!

Click here to learn more about the Heart & Soul Ceremony Kit and how it works.