How To Elope Anywhere In The World + Printable Checklist
Elopement planning guide, tips & advice from 13 years of experience guiding couples to have their dream elopement.
Sierra & Brent in a quintessential “we just got eloped” moment.
(Our photos are in the mountains, but this advice works for beach, desert, city and any location worldwide)
Welcome to simple, stress-free advice on how to elope! No matter where you’re eloping, these same quintessential “how-to’s still apply. I’m Lisa Hunter - elopement officiant and planning guide. Having overseen the planning of 446 elopements at the time of this writing, I’ve got insight to share ;)
Below you’ll find answers to all your big questions:
Why do people elope and should we elope - is it right for me and my fiancé?
Are elopements real weddings - do they count?
How do I make this happen and what are the steps?
How should I budget?
How do I decide between it being just the two of us or bringing close loved ones too?
What legal requirements do I need to know?
What about the ceremony - how do we make sure we have an amazing experience?
How do we tell those who aren’t invited without causing hurt feelings?
I’ve also made you a printable Elopement Planning Checklist to download for free.
The checklist will bring your practical to-do’s into focus so that you can rest easy that you’re not missing any action steps to make your elopement real.
Click or right-click here or on the image to download and print to use.
Also in the works: Week-Of and Day-Of Elopement Checklists. Coming soon!
Use the checklist to plan it all.
Why Couples Elope And How To Tell If It’s Right For You
Couples tend to elope for the same reason or set of reasons - see which apply to you below…
The Main Reasons Couples Elope - Is This You?
I’ve talked with hundreds of eloping couples, and eloping always boils down to the same kinds of reasons, no matter where you live and no matter your elopement destination. If any or all of the following are you, then eloping fits your desires and you’re definitely wise to explore it more. Keep scouting out the elopement path if you…
Want to avoid the stress and cost of a big wedding.
Just want your wedding to be about the two of you and your connection.
Relax at the idea of not having 100 guests watching your intimate moment.
Would love to avoid some dynamics with loved ones that a big wedding would surely evoke.
Have always pictured getting married on a beach, mountain or anywhere free of all the fuss.
Just want simple and stress-free.
And yes, elopements are real weddings - they do count!
As long as you fulfill whatever legal paperwork is required, and you’ll learn all about that later in this guide in addition to everything else you need to know…
Step 1: Get Clear On WHERE You Want To Elope
Get clear on the location of your elopement and everything else can fall into place.
Start by identifying your ideal experience, rather than starting with budget.
Not that budget doesn’t matter, it’s definitely a major factor in your decision-making. AND I’ve seen it again and again with couples - when you start with budget, you typically underestimate what it will really cost, plus as you discover what you truly want to experience during your elopement day, your parameters around budget can change. That doesn’t mean that it has to get more expensive than you initially hoped, but no need to delude yourself with wishful thinking about what you hope you’ll spend before you’ve really looked into what you truly want and what it will actually cost ;)
It all starts with where you want to elope.
If you’re drawn to eloping, you’ve likely got a picture in your mind. What is it? Are you on a beach… or at the base of a mountain… or the top of a mountain… or at a courthouse… or in the desert… or in the city… or (insert whatever you’re picturing here)?
Now explore that kind of elopement location online. The “where” of eloping is the first key decision - once that’s clear, then vendors, travel and all other plans can fall in place around the location. View lots of photos and get a sense of what people or companies are out there to help guide you with the experience. In the process, you’ll not only get clear on the kind of location, you’ll see lots of elopement experiences which will spark your own ideas about what you want for your day.
Now that you’ve got your vision for the WHERE and the kind of experience you want to have, let’s line out a typical elopement day so that you can make decisions from the perspective of someone who knows exactly what happens as the day itself unfolds…
Before Step 2, First Get Familiar With What Happens On A Typical Elopement Day
Here’s The Scoop…
Once you know how an elopement day works, it’s so much easier to picture it happening and to plan.
The rollout of an elopement day is so much simpler than a big wedding! Here’s how it typically unfolds…
Two Or More Days Before Your Date
Arrive in town if you’re coming from out of town. Get your marriage license, with enough time allotted for it to be valid on your wedding day (this varies, depending on location). Do a practice drive to your elopement location so that you know how to get there on the day-of. Take care of any last-minute or unexpected errands.
On The Day-Of
Typically elopements happen in the hours just before sunset for the best photo lighting. Or if you’re having your ceremony earlier, then just crunch the following into a shorter time frame:
Wake
Pinch yourself with excitement that your day is here!
Optional Hair & Makeup
If professional hair & makeup is in the mix, typically the stylist will come to your lodging. Allot around 2 hours for both bridal hair and makeup.
Anything To Pick Up
If one partner is doing hair and makeup, that’s the perfect time for the other partner to go pickup flowers and/or cake if you’ve got either of those in the mix. Or if you have guests coming with you, then one of them can do any pickups. If you’re having an all-day photography experience rather than just during and after the ceremony, then your photographer may be there taking photos during your getting-ready time.
Get Dressed
Drive
Drive to your elopement location to meet up with your photographer, plus any planner, officiant and/or videographer. If you have guests in the mix, they meet up at this time too. If the photographer is just arriving, they typically start taking photos now, with the goal to document the entire experience.
Head To The Ceremony Spot
If it’s a simple elopement, it will usually be a short walk. If it’s more of an epic elopement, you may at this point embark on a big hike or some kind of wild adventure like Jeeping to your spot or the countless kinds of other unique activities you can choose if you want a bigger adventure-elopement kind of day.
*Important Style Note
Both simple or epic elopement plans are great. Just depends on the kind of experience you want. Either will be fun and meaningful.
Have Your Ceremony
More on that later in this guide.
Take After-Ceremony Photos
With a stunning backdrop and your just-married glow. If you have guests, you’ll take friends/family photos in addition to photos of the two of you.
Go Out To Celebrate
Or not. This is the beauty of an elopement. Some couples make reservations for a fancy dinner. Some chill at a brewery or bar. Some go back to their lodging and relax. Some decide in the moment. You can do whatever the heck you want!
Step 2: Now That You Know How The Day Works, Decide On Vendors & Budget
(Plus this will solve legal requirements too!)
Secure your core team, which will finalize your location and date too, then you can add in details like flowers!
Start With Your Core Team First + Finalize Location And Date
Your core team is usually some combo of planner, photographer and officiant. Some may play more than one role. For instance, photographers often act as planners. Or in my case, I’m an officiant, but also an expert in planning elopements. If they specialize in elopements, any one of these three - and most likely all of them - will know all about the kind of location that you want and how to secure it. So that’s handy: when you put your core team in place, you’ll usually finalize your location if you haven’t already, and you’ll also finalize your elopement date based on what works for all involved.
Cool Insight About Legal Requirements
Core team vendors typically know about the permits or entry passes needed for specific locations, and often have secured those things themselves to include in their packages. So you don’t have to research it yourself - just ask a core vendor to guide you. Same goes for marriage license - core vendors who are elopement experts will typically know what steps you need to take next to secure your license in their area.
Finalize Travel Plans, Additional Vendors & Attire
Now that you have your date and location, book your travel and lodging next since these things book out the soonest. Also start shopping for wedding attire- especially anything that will need alterations since that can take time.
And every couple is different when it comes to additional services. You may want both hair & makeup, plus flowers. Or one of those. Or none. You may want a small cake. Or not. You may want videography. Or additional photo time. These are the typical additional services that I see couples choose the most. And then some couples may have more in the mix if they’re going for more of an epic adventure or multifaceted experience.
Plan On A Budget Of More Or Less, Depending On How Fancy You Get
I’ve seen couples pull off spending as little as $3,000 USD by choosing more basic lodging and keeping additional services to a minimum. And I’ve also heard of couples going super glam with every one of their vendors and additional services, which can add up fast to somewhere like $10,000 here in the states as an example. If you’re traveling overseas, road tripping is not an option, so factor in higher flight costs too. This is where it gets really clear what is most important to you. You’ll spend more on whatever that is, and cut back on the rest.
The only time I’ve seen couples able to spend less than 3K USD total for everything is if they use super green or inexperienced vendors who charge very low prices. Also, some elopement companies who are kind of like elopement mills (doing hundreds or thousands of elopements per year) will offer a very minimal service at a basement rate. And there’s always the $35 + the cost of gas elopement scenario here in Colorado - road trip here, camp, get your marriage license for $35 and sign it yourselves (you can do that in this state) while taking selfies on some beautiful mountain ;)
Step 3: Decide Who Comes And How To Tell Those Who Are Not Coming
You may choose to bring a small group of close family/friends with you.
Or you may want it to be just the two of you.
Just the two of you? Or bringing along close family and/or friends?
It’s the quintessential elopement question. See which of the following best fits you, then follow my advice for how to decide…
You’re crystal clear - just the two of you.
Well, that’s easy, no advice needed!
You want to bring a few close loved ones and are clear about who.
Again, you’re all set. And you can visit my Elopement Announcement Cards page here for advice on how to tell those who are not invited that you are eloping.
You want to bring a small group of guests, but you’re not sure how to invite some people and not others.
Ah yes, this one can be stressful. It’s probably pretty clear who you want there for sure, but then you go down the rabbit hole of “If I invite person X then I can’t not invite person Y.” Before you know it, the guest group has grown beyond your original vision and it’s no longer feeling like the simple, intimate elopement you wanted.
This comes down to one question: “Which do you want more - 1) having only the people you truly want there or 2) inviting beyond your ideal group in order to make others happy or avoid hurt feelings or tension?” You’d think it shouldn’t be the second one since elopements are about doing what YOU want, but it may be that it’s more important to you to make others happy or to avoid hurt feelings than to have your first-pick group with you. Or, you may feel that yes, you want only your first-pick group, and that is more important than how those uninvited will respond.
There are no right or wrong answers here! Just be honest with yourself about which is most important to you, and that is the right answer and that is okay! Plus you have my Elopement Announcement Card page here for advice to let everyone know in the most graceful way possible.
Step 4: Planning An Unforgettable Ceremony
A beautiful, intimate experience during your ceremony is the key to an unforgettable day.
My most important tip about planning your elopement ceremony:
Don’t just wing it! It’s tempting because of the simplicity of elopements - you don’t need to get all fancy with the ceremony, it’s just saying some nice things to each other and exchanging rings, right?
Well… yes and no. I’m friends with a lot of photographers so I hear about tons more elopements than just mine, and the “unfortunate elopement story” I hear the most is that the couple tried to just wing the ceremony in the moment and found they didn’t really know what to do or how/when to do it. Which makes for awkward moments. And also reduces the chance of beautiful photo moments because you’re more “in the awkward” than in feeling your connection.
The ceremony is actually the core of your entire elopement
What is the purpose of a wedding if not to make vows to one another in a deeply meaningful, connected way, then give each other physical objects that symbolize your commitment. Interestingly, it’s really easy to forget this because our culture has become so obsessed with photos. Couples often plan their elopements around the photo opportunities, and maybe even write some thoughtful vows to each other, but then don’t know how to actually facilitate making those vows on the day itself.
If you’ve hired an officiant, then you’re all set. But if you’re self-solemnizing (you can marry yourselves in some states) or having a friend or family member officiate, your day will be so much more smooth, meaningful and beautiful if you plan how you’ll do the ceremony.
I’ll soon have a whole page with step-by-step guidance to create an amazing elopement ceremony. Stay tuned for the link! And in the meantime, you can visit my Wedding Ceremony Script page here which is for venue wedding ceremonies, but it will still give you a solid idea of what to do during a wedding ceremony.
Don’t Forget to Download The Free Printable Elopement Planning Checklist
Get going with the steps on this page using this easy checklist.
Check off the items to put everything in place for your elopement. Simple!
Click here or on the image to download.
And Since You’re Eloping, You’re Probably Thinking About Writing Your Vows…
The Vow Adventure Kit has helped hundreds of couples write beautiful, meaningful vows.
If you want step-by-step guidance, here’s a link to my Vow Adventure Kit. I’ve officiated for more than 900 couples since 2013 and in that time they’ve all used this kit to write the most amazing, beautiful, meaningful vows.
Even if you’re not a natural writer or don’t think of yourself as “good with words”, the Vow Kit will guide you to easily write them in such a way that feels simply like you talking, rather than some elevated poetry that you might be worried you need to write.
This is the most meaningful way to write your vows.
It will feel so good to share them with your soon-to-be spouse on your day, and he/she/they will feel your love and commitment deeply when hearing them.